Bacon’s day

 Report from the feast of bacon in Kolyvan  08/29/2011, 06:29
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Bacon’s day
Photo by Andrey Ksenchuk

On early Saturday morning Sib.fm edition looked up at the sky, bathed in cold gray clouds, sighed, and went to bask in the district center of Novosibirsk, Kolyvan village.

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in Russian

It was the fourth time when a «Celebration of bacon» was organized: an event with poems and ditties about its product, piggy runs, honey wine, poured under-the-counter, and other agricultural joys. Starting this year, it was decided to hold celebrations on a grand scale, worthy one-hour journey to the regional center, and to make a real contribution into the development of domestic tourism in the country..

Yandex mercilessly states that a holiday in honor of fat from animal species Susscrofadomesticus is not so much of a unique creative thing. Celebrations with the same, as in Kolyvan village, name are regularly held in at least five Ukrainian municipalities and one Italian province (in Italy, however, they prefer bacon with rosemary).

The chief ideologist of pork festival in Kolyvan, the head of the district department of culture, Ms. Natalia Druzhinina, gets a grant from the regional administration for the fourth year in a row. She says that the most important thing in this celebration — is not a spiritless gastronomy, butan inter-ethnic and cross-cultural unity.

— It is not an agricultural fair; it’s a creative, theatrical holiday, where we praise the bacon (tallow), where we sing an occasional ode to the bacon! — explains Ms. Druzhinina..

Waiting for some foreigners, on whom the skills of «event tourism» organization can be practiced. But foreigners are not visible.

Perhaps, because nobody has placed a detailed program of the holiday on the internet.

— Oh my mother wanted so much to give me away for the fifth men, and the fifth is a drunkard damn! Oh, do not give me to him, mother! (These are words from a Russian folklore song about a mother, who wanted her daughter to get married as soon as possible)

Don’t you press me up a plane tree,
Don’t you spend your rage in vain.
Don’t you take me for a bimbo
When we’re married — ask again!

The Minister of Culture of the Novosibirsk region, Ms. Natalia Yaroslavtseva, says something about multiculturalism from the stage. People gradually begin to drink alcohol.

Appetizers are cherished for the competition and you are not allowed to purchase them yet.The contestants arrived to the regional center from the nearby villages and determined not to hit the dirt with their bacon.But the authority that will choose the winner cannot have enough of talks into a microphone.

Appetizers are, however, delicious. A spicy steam rises over baked potatoes; delicate breasts softly gleam in the light of flash bulbs, tons of salted cucumbers (pickles) blink with garlic cloves to the sweaty bottle of mead (honey wine). So many tasty food, that the mouth if full of water, but you cannot start eating until the authority finishes the speech on the stage.

— So what is your best product?
— Best product? Everything is the best, produced here in the village.

There is no holiday in Kolyvan village without competitions like «A plait is a girlish beauty» and «My favorite pet».

Pig races are the apotheosis of the traditional holidays, although, by some reason, races have never been performed here before. Before the start all of the four «athletes» are containedat the same piggish conditions. I can hear obscene squealing from bags.

A fifth «athlete» is a pig named Krueger and he arrives separately.He is not a graduate of a pig farm. His home is a town house with a personal trainer and so on.

To make long story short, Krueger wins and gets the reward.

A pig has tried a cake for the first and, obviously, for the last time in his life.

And, yes, the bacon in Kolyvan is really-really tasty.

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